Love Letter For Mahler

Gustav Mahler №5 Adagietto was the first Mahler piece that I adore and in my humble opinion, this piece is one shred of evidence that shows what kind of things that human beings are capable of. This piece also guides me to appreciate Mahler's other works like Symphony №8, Quartet in C# Sharp Minor, Das Lied Von Der Erde, And Symphony №2. For Symphony №2 this one is special for me since I promise to myself that I shouldn't die before listening to Mahler №2 in person. But I’m not going to admire №2 in this casual essay, but the piece that made me adore Mahler as a composer, which is Symphony №5 Adagietto. It is said that Mahler Symphony №5 was created to represent Mahler’s love for his wife Alma even though some experts doubt it and quite a lot of people interpreted this piece as depressing melancholic music, well I can’t judge their interpretation, using only strings and harp, in this movement Mahler has created the melodies with the slow as long with the intense build-up which had emerged an unexplainable depth feeling, I as well often face the yearn of heartbreaking feelings that suddenly appears while listening to this piece, though I found that this piece is way far from that. For me, there is nothing romantic nor depressing about it, it’s something rather existentialist, it’s ruminating rather than depicting, it is an expression of astonishing energy, It is a human being on a bright day, in the prime of his existence.

I remember when the first time that I hear this piece, I was alone driving my car on my way to school, and as usual, to bring up my mood in the morning, I listen to classical music. Schubert, Beethoven, Bach, Mozart, Rachmaninoff, Chopin, Tchaikovsky, and many others have been my morning routine it was just like a simple breakfast that I can’t miss, but Mahler wasn’t one of them. On that morning while I'm on my way to school, at first, I listened to Chopin because at that time I was learning Nocturne but I can’t recall which one specifically, that morning I thought that I had enough with the Nocturne that so-called romantic, mysterious and magical since I listened to it frequently at that time, and because of that I decide to choose the music randomly in the hope that I can find another excellent piece of music that wait for me to be discovered, fortunately, that morning Mahler №5 is the piece that I unintentionally choose, and that was one of the best decisions of my life. I thought it was just another ordinary classical piece that I haven’t heard of until the music starts, the harp begins to spread her voice throughout my car goes along with the sound of the violin that is so gentle but powerful as if she whispers something delicates, and after the first three bars, I slammed the car brake as if I was almost got into a car crash, but it was nearly my car that is on sight in the road. at the side of the road, I was thinking that there’s perhaps something that is missing, I just didn’t know what was it, and after a few seconds of gazing at the barely empty road with only a few motorcycles that go around the corner with their muffler that emits a dirty black smoke that gave off an unpleasant smell throughout the air, then I realize that I forgot to bring my school bag. No, not because I was amazed by his music, but it was just because I forgot to bring my school bag, even though there’s nothing inside it. Exactly, at first, I didn’t promptly like this piece, it took time to fully appreciate this piece, and that reminds me what many musicians have said “If you want to look more intelligent, just say that you love Mahler” I don’t quite understand why Mahler has this reputation, perhaps it’s complicated to like it, or it takes dedication and a deep understanding of music to love it, even though I didn’t quite found any difficulties in appreciating Mahler, I just love it as time goes by. What I do know, to really appreciate something, sometimes it takes quite a time.

Beethoven said, “It is the power of music to carry one directly into the mental state of the composer” I’m not quite sure if he really say that, and I’m too lazy to do research about it, but what matters is that the quote is right. For example, when you listen to l songs with the lyrics that are extremely heartbreaking, you might recall the times with your Ex, or when you listen to your national anthem, your heart will be filled with pride and glory to your country. that’s music, playing our emotions, but sometimes not created with one. Just like Adele and National Anthem to other people, this piece also reminds me something, it reminds me that life is meaningless. I Can’t describe why this piece always reminds me that life is filled with void and nothingness, I’m wondering myself how can such music compel me to contemplate my existence. I can’t find the proper words to explain the emotions, that I got for this piece. Perhaps it’s just something personal, that only I myself who’s able to see it. But one thing for sure, this piece has been a witness of my life for these past few years, a witness of the time that I miss, and the one that I regret, a witness for all of my anxieties, all of my pride, and all of those memories that haunted me along with this piece. this piece was always there and will always be there, this piece is a reflection of myself, a faithful friend of mine.

I dedicated this essay as a Love Letter to Gustav Mahler, one of the best composers that ever lived, a legend, an exceptional human being, my hero. Thank you for always inspiring people even though you are not here since 100 years ago. through your music, you gave me another reason to live, and I have to thank you for that, All of my appreciation goes to you.

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